Saturday 3 November 2018

A Love Letter To Myself


Dear Jacqui, the poet… I love you.

picture by Ashara Ekundayo
I love you when you don’t love yourself and I love you when you do. I love you through the darkness and light and I love you when you are being problematic. I love you when you are im/perfect and I love you as you seek to learn and educate. I love that you stick to your guns and are also willing to bend and compromise, I love you because I love you and you are You.

There has never been and can never be another like you.

Fuck, I love you when you are arrogant and confident and I love it when you dance. I love your truthfulness and your insane capacity to love in an often times loveless world and I love how you have expanded your capacity to forgive even what you thought was unforgivable before.

I absolutely love it when you go higher into Christ consciousness and deeper into your ancestral roots. I love that you love God and I love that you know what it is to be an atheist. I love that you love books, which continuously save you and remind you that you are not mad, but it is the world that is.

Child, I love that when you were just a child you owned your sexuality in a world that could kill you for being you, and indeed does. I love that you stood up to your mother and family, chosen and blood, so you could live a life of truth. I love that not just the art but the life expressions of Mathosa and Fassie inspired and continues to inspire you. More importantly, I love how that inspiration has shaped your life's work and how you too, inspire others to seek freedom.

image from google


Jacqui I'm absolutely in love with your "bo don’t care" attitude! It keeps you alive. I urge you to never care about what the world and others think but as your friend reminded you, to always live and perform for the audience of one. Love, which is God.

I love that you have nurtured your talents and protected your intellectual property, you value yourself. I also love that you finally woke up to the fact that it is not money that is evil… nor power… but how we use them that can be.

Let it be known that no one can ever have loved you as your mother did, despite her faults, she birthed you. No one is perfect, let your mother's life always be a reminder of that, and never ever stop cherishing her ability to have shown you unconditional love. It is rare, even from mothers.

I love that you consult with a spiritual medium and I love that you pray.

I love your writing and cannot wait for the day it sees the light of day in the form of a book, exactly as your medium and healer told you it should be, erotic short stories. I love that you laugh at this and think of your ancestors as unconventional types, exactly as you are, of course, you are them.

Jacqui I love that you have sustained love for a long time with Kgomotso and I love that you have continued to love and forgive each other for so long. I love that you love children and animals, and that they too love you. I love your soul. I love that you will not wait until death for others to express posthumous love for you but that you express it to yourself, yourself. That’s just who you are.

I love that this letter may inspire others to love themselves, warts and all, unconditionally too. It's just what you do.

I love how you love others but like your wife I also do wish you would turn more of that love towards yourself, this is a great sign that you are doing that.

***Artwork by Jo-El Lopez. 

Forgive yourself, just as you do others. Let your cup overrun before you pour, and all the best for one of your best brain child's, The church of queers. The Queers in the hereafter are waiting for it, kill it!

It is something to behold how huge you dream and how you pursue those sometimes seemingly impossible dreams. You are star material, you know this… your job is to remind others that they too are.

I love you.

1love my heart… Reamogetse.


PS: God is Love. ๐Ÿ’•๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿ’œ

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